Money and marriage
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” (NIV) Genesis 2:24
Bible reading: Ephesian 5:25-33
“Money is like a land mine in marriage, it lies quietly in the field until one day you step on it in a certain way, and it explodes”-Gary Chapman. You may not be surprised to hear that a married couple's fights over finances is one of the top predictors of whether a marriage will end up in divorce. Usually, you hear arguments such as these: “I’m the one working hard to earn the money around here, so I get to decide how we spend it.” “You’d think I could get a little respect, considering that I’m the one who makes the money to keep this family going.”
Money and marriage can be a source of stress and problem for couples whether they earn much or less than their partner. It is hard to see couples earn similar or equal income because of differences such as degree, or type of occupation. The moment one or both feel they can leverage their income over the other because they earn more, arguments and resentment set in regarding spending.
Couples need to recognize the reality that in marriage, there is nothing like “your money” or “my money” but rather “our money.” Likewise, it does not matter if the wife works and the husband takes care of the home, or vice versa, it makes no difference. If they both work, it does not matter if a woman has a career that out earns her husband, or vice versa, it is still “our money.” The two become one flesh. In my own situation, my husband and I have held on to the principle of “our money” as a foundation in our marriage. In our marriage, there is financial freedom, and we have the liberty in our relationship to focus on other things beyond finances. This principle is rooted in the scripture in Genesis 2:24 “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Additionally, “our money” principle emulates the spiritual truths of the Bible in Ephesians 5:25-33. Let us keep God at the center and in control of our marriage, not money.
God bless you!